


Destiny

by TheVillain



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Happy Ending, M/M, Soulmarks, Starvation, True Love, sort-of slow burn (with WS Bucky)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-15
Updated: 2017-03-15
Packaged: 2018-10-05 19:35:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10315460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheVillain/pseuds/TheVillain
Summary: Steve and Buck were soulmates from a young age. After coming out of the ice 70 years later, Steve is still grieving terribly over losing Bucky until he crosses paths with the Winter Soldier. The realized connection they both have leaves them imprisoned at a Hydra base. They must build upon what their bond and their hearts have been telling them in order to survive and perhaps finally reunite, as one, and stronger than ever.





	

Destiny  


Steve Rogers always believed that love was destiny. In a world of soulmates, you were born to live life with the only person who could make you feel complete. Steve Rogers also believed in hope. Although, It must be said that he did not need to hope to find his soulmate for long for Steve's soulmate revealed himself to him in the form of one James Buchanan Barnes when he was just a kid. Most people don't even know until later in life. This made their bond especially strong. As children, they never thought about it much or cared. It was always just Steve and Bucky. As they got older, Bucky had been a flirt but it never bothered Steve much. He knew that Bucky loved him with every thread of his being. As such with soulmates.

When they made love in their old, dingy apartment, Bucky would suck and kiss Steve's soulmate mark that displayed as a tattoo on his arm in Bucky's handwriting. "James Buchanan Barnes" More often than not, it would made Steve shiver in warmth and pleasure. If he was close, that act alone could make him come. "Ohh, God, Buck." Steve would gasp, eyes heavy lidded. Moments like this made Bucky happiest. To see his other half completely lost in feelings of bliss. Steve looked breathtaking as his small body found release. Bucky truly loved Steve's body. He found it so special and delicate, perfection. Rough sex was rarely an option with Steve's health but neither seemed to mind although every now and then Steve felt guilty. Bucky, in turn, made sure that guilt was short lived.

It wasn't all candy and honey. Despite their strong love for the other, both were equally stubborn. Compromises were difficult to reach when both of them refused to give an inch. Many times it was about money, which segued into Steve's health, the weather. In the end, a lot of their arguments had worry or fear at the heart of it.

"Are you crazy? There ain't no way you are goin' out in a foot of snow to walk to the grocers." Bucky stated, knowing he was in for a dispute with his spitfire blonde.

"I'm not a child, Bucky. Besides, we're both starving and we have no food! Nothing!" Steve argued, already pulling layers on.

"Then why don't you stay here and let me go? You ain't thinkin' straight, doll." Bucky still tried to reason. He wasn't going to let the love of his life stumble through a blizzard worth of snow only to get sick with pneumonia or worse. Steve just grabbed his scarf.

"And what happens when you get sick, huh?" he continued. Steve huffed, slowing down but not totally stopping either. "I'm not gonna watch you be barely conscious on our bed wondering if... if." Bucky can't even look at him. "If you're even gonna make it through the night or not."

This was enough to make Steve back peddle and slowly start removing his old jacket, gloves, and everything else. "I can't lose you, Stevie. Please, for fucks sake. This isn't about your pride! You don't need to prove anything to me. Don't you get it? You think you're worthless to me because you're small or sick but by now you should know that's not what I think. I can't live this life without you, Steve. I won't."

Steve stood there completely stunned. He expected Bucky to banter with him about getting sick but he didn't expect to see Bucky so broken up about it this time. Steve sighed, knowing that Bucky was right. He gently took Bucky's hand.

"I'm sorry, Buck.." he whispered. Bucky sighed deeply. "Me, too." Bucky agreed.

"Just tell me what you need from the store and I'll be back in about an hour, alright?" Bucky asked, hoping this was now clear.

"Could use some bread and soup, crackers.. and maybe apples." Steve listed, resigned to sitting cross-legged on their bed with a sketch pad on his lap.

"You got it, babydoll. See you soon." and Bucky pressed a deep, warm kiss to Steve's soft lips.

Bucky counted the nickles and change he had in his pocket as he left their apartment, thinking that he could cover it all. Most of his paycheck had already gone to rent and this was their food money, however little it was. Bucky would make it work. He would stretch that penny so long as Steve is safe, warm, and fed.  


It was freezing out there and Bucky was inwardly thankful that Steve gave in this time. He pulled his coat around himself tighter and breathed a warm breath into cupped, thin-gloved hands. To Bucky's delight, the usual bread they buy and the crackers were on sale. After picking up a couple of apples and three cans of soup, he thought he could surprise Stevie with a small box of cookies. He made sure it was one of the few kinds that Steve wouldn't get an allergic reaction from.  


When Steve hurt- Bucky hurt. Not in the same way, but it's been known to them both now for a while that Bucky's Soulmate mark would burn like it was set ablaze causing terrible aching pain whenever Steve was very ill or very injured. This also happened with deep emotional pain. It was like a direct message to Bucky, wherever he was, that something was wrong with Steve and Bucky had to get to him. Needless to say, Bucky's arm was sore more often than not but he didn't mind. Steve getting better was always his main priority.

Steve's mark behaved differently when it was Bucky who was in distress. Bucky didn't get sick nearly as often as Steve, or into as many fist fights, but every so often he would have an emotional meltdown. Working hard, long, hours and coming home to Steve's stubborn bitching, worrying if they had enough money for rent, or to eat, what if Steve got sick? In these times, along with the few illness and injuries a person has in life, Steve can feel his soulmate mark react. It chilled him down to the bone in a cold so painful that it almost felt searing hot. It was like he left his arm in a bucket of freezing cold ice water for a week. That was always Steve's warning as to Bucky not being alright.

Bucky walked in, shutting the door behind him and putting the bags on the table. 

"Buck, you're back." Steve says, getting up and going over to help put everything away. As Bucky went to hang his coat up and remove his gloves and scarf, he can tell that Steve found the cookies.

"You got cookies? You know we can't afford that."

Bucky smiled. "There was a sale today, babydoll. I thought I'd surprise ya."

Instead of complaining, Steve smiled back and kissed Bucky on his cheek. Bucky took one of the soup cans and thought it was time to feed his best guy. In a way, Bucky liked it. Although it just sort of happened that he would be Steve's "protector" of sorts, he liked being the one to take care of him. Sure, it stressed him out, but he wouldn't want anyone else. After all, Steve was made for him and he was made for Steve.

Things stayed relatively the same for a while until Steve's ma passed away. Bucky's soul mark was burning and he did everything he could to comfort Steve. There wasn't much he could do but he tried his best.  


Then there was Peal Harbor. Bucky's enlistment. The draft. Soul marks on all people producing pain. Steve recently lost his ma and now he was going to lose his soul mate.

"Please, Buck, you can't." Steve sniffled. Bucky pulled him into a tight hug and rested his chin on the top of Steve's head.

"I have to, Babydoll." Bucky sighed. Both men's soul marks were feeling sore. Steve pulled away and looked at Bucky seriously.

"Then promise me you'll come back."

"You know I can't do that either.." Bucky trailed off.

They pulled each other in for another tight hug, Bucky teary eyed and Steve crying. Now all Steve had was Bucky's name on his arm.  
But once that name grew chilled and then frozen on Steve, he knew he had to get to Bucky. He'd do anything and the serum was exactly what he needed to get to him. The pain was constant and slowly getting worse, pushing Steve harder and harder to find him.

Steve felt sick when he learned of the capture of the 107 and took it upon himself, with the help of a few others, to break them out. Bucky seemed disoriented but became clear after a moment when he saw Steve's face. Steve felt the cold let up just a bit.

"Steve?" Bucky asked as Steve quickly undid the restraints. Steve would explain everything after he got Buck out of there.

It wasn't until Bucky fell from the train that Steve had felt the most excruciating pain of his life. Worse than anything he's suffered pre-serum. It wasn't just his arm that was hurting, the pain and cold spread throughout his body turning his organs to ice and his skin radiating like an air conditioner. The cold mountain weather seemed like a warm day in summer compared to this. Steve wept and grit his teeth through the waves of aching discomfort.

Bucky was gone.

At least that's what everyone tried to convince him. Steve refused to believe it.

After emerging from the ice nearly 70 years later, he still didn't believe it.

Sometimes he could feel a soft, cool breeze on his mark but it's so fleeting and soft that no one thinks it's significant. It's Steve's grief and wishful thinking. James Buchanan Barnes was dead and Steve did not want to let him go. He couldn't. Sam had suggested that Steve go to a support group for people who lost their soulmate but Steve politely refused.

"Come on, Man. It might do you some good. Don't do this to yourself." Sam tried.

"I appreciate your concern but I got this. Please." Steve pleaded and he really did want to handle this on his own. This was his Bucky, not another person he didn't know, as harsh as that sounded. A support group would not ease his pain.

"That's fine, but at least help us with this case. Get your mind off things. We've been trying to track down this assassin who goes by the Winter Soldier. No one ever sees him, like a ghost they say." Sam explains. Steve nods this time. While he's not yet done grieving, and not sure he ever will be, a distraction sounded good.

"Alright."

Steve followed Sam to the briefing room where Tony, Nat, Clint and Wanda were already there, waiting.

"Yo, Capsicle, 'bout time!" Tony exclaimed, slapping Steve on the back.

"So, what do we know about this "Winter Soldier"?" Steve asked, sitting down with a sigh.

"Not much." Natasha responded. "As to who he actually is, we don't have a name, a face, nothing. Not even Tony came up with anything."

"And whoever this guy is, he must be good If not even _I_ can find him." Tony cut in.

"What we're saying is we need you, Cap." Sam adds, hoping Steve will be willing to put himself in this. Steve looked at his soulmark and gave it a light scratch before accepting.

"Let's do this. Tony, can you get his last known location at least? I mean, I need something to work with."

"On it, Cap."

The team breaks and Steve doesn't get a lead from Tony until two weeks later. At this point, Steve is grateful he agreed to finally get out. He's been going stir crazy when he hasn't been stewing in his own emptiness.

When Steve first lays eyes on the Winter Soldier, the first things he notices is his obscured face and what looks to be a metal arm. It wasn't Steve who found the Winter Soldier, though. The Winter Soldier found Steve.

The Soldier wasted no time in attempting to eliminate his target. Every crack of Steve's bones, every puncture from a knife stab, caused the soldier to growl in pain. It didn't make him stop. It only made him more ruthless. He just kept at it, doing his best to end Captain America's life.

Steve's eyes went wide when the mask fell from the soldier's face. He knew right away but stuttered in shock. 

"B-Bucky?"

Bucky didn't seem to hear him, wrapping his hands around his throat and squeezing. The more Bucky tightened his grip, choking the life from Captain America, the more Bucky winced and groaned until he let go. Steve was left panting to catch his breath while Bucky just stood there. Steve saw in his eyes that Bucky knew. Maybe not exactly who he was but knew that he was his soulmate.

Before anything else could be said, Bucky tossed a smoke bomb, then, all that remained was an empty spot where he once stood.

Natasha rushed over, helping Steve up. "Are you alright? What the hell happened?"

Steve shook his head, feeling icy shock waves pulse throughout his arm.

"Just don't kill him." was all Steve could say.

"What's going on, man?" Sam put a hand on Steve's shoulder and when Steve looked up, his whole team looked on at him with concern.

"It was my soulmate."

Sam shook his head.

"Look. Steve. I know you're hurting without him but he's gone and you need to accept that. You said yourself that you saw him fall from that train. There's no way anyone could have survived that and you know it. And the pain you felt at the time? Even your body was telling you he was gone, Steve. You have to let him go."

Steve was trembling. Even Tony was silent.

Natasha lightly sighed and took Steve by the arm. "Let's get back. Then we'll figure out what to do from there."

Later that night he could over-hear hear Nat and Sam arguing back and forth about what happened.

"Nat, that wasn't his mate."

"But what if it was? I've never seen Steve look like that before."

"You can't be serious. Let's say that by some miracle, Barnes survived the fall. Don't you think he'd be well into his 90's or dead by now? And don't you think he would have found Steve a lot sooner?" Sam questioned. Natasha was quiet.

"James Barnes died over 70 years ago. I'll be the first one to say that I can't imagine what Steve's going through but more emotional cracks could sabotage our team and our mission. Not to mention it will break Steve along the way. This isn't right for him or anyone else so I won't baby him and you shouldn't either."

The next day, Natasha couldn't help but be easy on Steve. She still wasn't sure what was going on but Sam did have good points. She sat next to him at the communal kitchen.

"I know what you're thinking, Nat. You don't believe me, that it was Bucky back there." Steve already knew that she would bring it up. He sensed it early on.

"I didn't say that." she stated carefully.

"I know Sam thinks I'm delusional but I felt it, Nat. It was him."

Natasha gave a small smile. "And what about him? Did he feel anything?" she asked.

"I.. I think so. The more he hurt me, the more pain it looked like he was in. It was almost like all the pain he was inflicting on me was going right to him. That's the bond. I know what I saw and what I felt. I didn't even tell Sam that I saw his face. I didn't think it would matter. This isn't some wishful thinking. It was Bucky."

Natasha actually looked more convinced. "You saw his face too? I believe you, Rogers. I do." she says quietly. With a gentle squeeze of Steve's arm, she got up and left.

A lot was swimming through Steve's mind, old memories, the real possibility of getting his Bucky back, thoughts of the future, guesses about what happened to him. He knew he had to clear his head so he went outside and started walking. The fresh air felt so good when it felt like the rooms were suffocating and closing around him.

In a way, Sam was right. Steve missed Bucky with his entire soul that just going from day to day took a large emotional toll on him. He was empty, depressed. He was so wrapped up in his own grief that he didn't even think about how it would affect the team. He rubbed a hand over his forehead. He was so fucked.  


Steve found an open bench at a park and sat down. It was getting late but he didn't care. He didn't feel like going back. Instead, he laid down, uncomfortable as it was, and closed his eyes.

He could see himself and Buck back on that train, the scene playing itself out again. If only he could reach a little bit more, try harder- but each time, it was no use and Bucky fell. Each time it happened, it broke Steve's heart more and more until he woke up screaming in a cold sweat.

When Steve awoke, it was well into night, and he was still on the park bench. Sweat was dripping down his forehead, his palms were sweaty, his shirt was sticking to him. He didn't have a nightmare that bad in so long. He even felt nauseous. After looking himself over real quick, there was a dark figure in the shadows. 

"You're in distress." the voice said. Steve's heart thumped rapidly in his chest.

He knew that voice..and then the figure moved slightly into the light of a nearby lamp post.

"Bucky.." he mumbled, almost in disbelief. The second time he was in total shock in two days.

"I don't know who this "Bucky" is, or who the hell you are either.. but I can feel your pain, your sorrow." Bucky admits, not coming any closer.

"It's because I'm your soulmate, Buck. Bucky is your name, well, your nickname, and I'm Steve, your soulmate." Steve carefully explained, trying not to talk too much and scare him away. Steve didn't know how Bucky didn't know all these clear signs of having a soulmate was.

"My mission is to eliminate you.. but I can't. Not because of the physical pain, although I have not felt a pain like that in recent times, but because I don't know why."  


Steve got up from the bench and took a small step forward.

"Don't come near me. I still have the urge to kill you, to drain the life from you." Bucky warned.

Steve froze.

"But you won't." and Steve kept moving closer, slowly. He could hear Bucky breathing heavily. Bucky remained silent and still as Steve approached him, very cautiously extending his hand, where Bucky can see it.

"Can I touch you?" Steve hesitantly asked. Still silence.. but he didn't say 'no' either so Steve gently touched Bucky's metal arm with the pads of his fingers. Lightly. Barely grazing the metal.

"Oh god, Buck, what did they do to you?" Steve asked softly. The Winter Soldier, the bloody ghost story of an assassin-- was _his_ Bucky.

"I am also here to tell you to stop following me. I still don't know who you are or who you think I am but since we do seem to be bonded in some way, I warn you to keep your distance." Bucky mumbles. "There is a chance that I may not kill you, but my handler and Hydra will not hesitate." he explains.

Steve didn't know what to say, he just didn't want Bucky to leave.

"I must report back. I'm warning you, do not follow me." and with that, Bucky pulled away and disappeared into the night.

Steve stood there, stunned, and once again heartbroken. But this time around, he didn't feel hopeless. His soulmate was alive and his soulmate came back to him despite the circumstances. Bucky was alive and no one was going to stop him from getting him back.

At dawn, Steve returned to the tower and wasted no time in getting his gear in order.

"I saw him, Sam. It was Bucky." this time Steve stated it confidently and sternly.

"Not this again.." Sam groaned. Steve looked him in the eye.

"You don't want to go with me? Fine. But that's my soulmate out there who needs me and not you or anyone else can stop me from getting to him."

"What did he say?" Clint asked curiously. Steve sighed.

"He doesn't remember who I am but I was right. He realized we were soulmates and that's why he didn't kill me.. his arm, though. Up close, god, it was horrible."

"I'm in." Nat suddenly said with a nod.

"I'll help you, buddy," Clint added. Tony joined and then Wanda. Steve's heart swelled with warmth at the commitment and trust his team had in him.

"Tony, he took off moving east. He was nervous so Hydra has to be around somewhere. Are there any vacant buildings, lots, anything that could be used as a safe house?" Steve asked, Tony doing his best with Jarvis and his tech to help Cap as best he could.

A powerful, sharp pain stabbed into Steve's arm, freezing cold. He held it to his chest and looked at the team. "They're hurting him, we have to find him now!" Steve yelled, worry tying knots in his belly.

"Alright, alright... I think I got a lock on him. There are heat sources in this abandoned warehouse here, same direction you said he went. They are in the shape of people and one does not have a heat signature where the left arm would be."

Steve rushed out of there, Nat and the rest following behind.

"You had one simple task!" Steve heard yelling as he crept close to the location door. "To kill Captain America, and here you are with the Captain still alive and breathing!"

There was a hard slap and an uncomfortable spark in Steve's arm. He couldn't wait any longer before breaking that damned door down.

The next ninety seconds were a blur. Each avenger went down, hitting the floor in an unconscious slam. Tranquilizer darts, high quality by the looks of it. There wasn't any time to go help them, or Buck, before there was sudden darkness.

"You knew you would be punished, Soldier. You defied orders and now you pay the price."- an unfamiliar voice with a thick Russian accent.

"Hurt me, then." Bucky said, trying to divert the attention to him instead of Captain America.

"Oh, that's the plan, but don't get smart with me or your little boyfriend will be dead within an hour, understand? Don't think we don't know whats going on."  


Bucky froze and felt goosebumps rise on his flesh. He didn't even know who Captain America was, not really, and he didn't know anything about him. It didn't pain him deeply on some cosmic level where there was Earth shattering love for this other person..yet there was still something that stuck in him like a splinter or a thorn that refused to be dislodged or forgotten about. Then came the name "Rogers." which only made the nag in his gut worse. By now, Bucky realized that Rogers was his soulmate but he was empty. There was definitely a link but if not for the pain reactions, Bucky wouldn't have felt any connection himself. He was broken, that much he knew.

"No response then? Good. Pyzow, bring him in." the damn Nazi says to the other. Seconds felt like hours when Rogers was dragged in only semi-conscious. His left eye was swollen shut but that would heal open soon.

"Break his arm, Soldier," Pyzow demands. Bucky is still frozen and silent. He can't get his mind and his body to cooperate. If he feels nothing for anyone, not even his own soulmate, why can't he hurt him? Why can't he obey a simple order?

"Very well," Pyzow's commanding officer says. He nods to Pyzow who grabs Rogers' arm and breaks it backwards at the elbow. Rogers screams at the snap, caught in moments of white pain to notice that Bucky is holding his own arm, groaning and struggling in pure agony.

Pyzow is laughing.

"You don't know me because I am now in charge- your new handler. You may call me Viktor. Pyzow here is my eyes and ears so I will know when you misbehave. Unfortunate that you aren't as smart as I have heard you were. You lead us right to your soulmate, thinking you can sneak into the park for a quick fuck? A pity your little soulmate hasn't died with the rest of that time period, but lucky for you, since he hasn't, and since you failed, maybe he can take part in some fun, too."

Bucky's metal hand clenched into a tight fist at his side.

Viktor gave a dramatic sigh. "And all you had to do was kill him. Now we just have more to hurt you with if you don't listen to us. Do you understand me? One more slip up and I won't hesitate to let my men at the Captain to do what they please. Pyzow, throw them in the coldest cell. Together. Let them bond, that way the pain will be that much more.. memorable. And yes, disappointing soldier, I could wipe you, but why miss all this fun? Take them away."

Bucky was slowly filling with rage but somehow he kept it at bay. He was at the heart of headquarters, escape wouldn't be likely and he would get himself and Steve killed. He had to protect Steve. He had to save him.

There was absolutely nothing in the small cell they were thrown into. No bed, no toilet, not a blanket or a window. They just had each other.

"I told you -not- to follow me." Bucky growled. Rogers huffed.

"I couldn't just let you go! You're my sou-"

"Yes, Yes, I know I'm your soulmate!" Bucky cut in. "That's not the point! You could have gotten us both killed!"

"I wasn't going to let that happen." Rogers countered, crossing his arms.

"Stubborn as always." Bucky grumbled, still annoyed that Rogers couldn't see the danger. He was in fucking la-la land.

"Wait, what did you say?" Steve asked, almost in disbelief. Bucky rolled his eyes, tired of his nonsense.

"I said you're stubborn as always." Bucky repeated.

"... how would you know that?"

Bucky didn't have an answer.

"Bucky, you know me. You have to remember!" Rogers almost begged, drunk on this tiny glimmer of hope that may or may not have been a memory.

"Stop it, Rogers! I said I don't know you!" Now Bucky's annoyance was starting to take over. He was frustrated, confused. If Rogers didn't fuck things up, none of this would be happening.

"I'll, I'll stop, alright? Just call me Steve." Steve sighed. Bucky nodded. "Steve,"

"You said you don't know me, fine.. but why did you come back?" It really was a simple question, and Steve, the persistent shit he was, already knew the answer. He still tried to bait Bucky despite telling him he would stop pushing him about it.

"How many times do I have to tell you? I. Don't. Know." Bucky grumbled.

Steve wanted to touch him. Steve wanted to hold Bucky and never let him go. It hurt to have him so close yet so far but it was clear Bucky wasn't ready to open up just yet so Steve shifted over, giving Bucky more space.

Neither of them spoke very much after that. Bucky would stare at the wall in boredom and Steve would dose off in the corner. This was all either could do until Steve internally felt like an un-natural amount of time went by without one person opening the door. No one to check on them, intimidate them, nothing.

"Is.. is it always like this?" Steve asked quietly. He wanted to talk to Bucky. So much. Steve was about to give up hope on ever hearing Bucky talk to him again when,

"Sometimes."

Bucky paused and then continued, "I usually get my memory wiped after each mission so I don't remember much about what's done to me. I just remember a few things, especially the painful shit."

"What happened to you?" Steve slid closer and his eyes showed worry.

"Like I said, I can't really say much, but after each mission, I get strapped to this chair. They zap my brain full of volts that makes my memory into swiss cheese." Bucky explains.

"What else?"

"I get beaten if I do what they consider a "sloppy job.""

Steve was now sitting side by side with him.

"How can you say that so easily? Like it doesn't bother you?" 

"It doesn't."

Steve doesn't believe him. Not for a damn second. Steve was sure that if Bucky were to choose to be beaten or not, he would choose to not be. That's how much it doesn't "bother him" Steve thought defiantly. He didn't press the matter.

"And you still felt me with your metal arm?" Steve questioned.

"I don't know how that happens. I don't feel pain with the metal arm, just pressure, basic hot/cold.. but the pain feels as real as if it were on my flesh arm."

This encouraged Steve to show Bucky his soulmark.

"Look." Steve said, showing Bucky his arm with Bucky's name on it. "That's your name. James Buchanan Barnes."

Bucky made a face. "James Buchanan? Well, that's a winner.." Bucky replied sarcastically. Steve smiled a little.

"You never liked that name so that's where your nickname "Bucky" came from. A nickname for Buchanan." Steve explained. Bucky looked at his name written across Steve's arm.

"I didn't know this was happening to you-- I- I would have stopped it." Steve stuttered. He didn't think this was the right time to mention Bucky's fall yet.  


Bucky sighed. "You couldn't have known. They were giving me soulmate suppressants for a long time. Then, they stopped recently, thinking that my soulmate would be dead by now. Any other person would be."

"But I'm not just any other person. It's why I'm made for you, Buck, and _not_ another person."

Bucky gave a small nod.

"But I've never heard of soulmate suppressants before." Steve added, curious to know more.

"They are experimental. They are used to weaken and muffle the bond between soulmates. They're working on something to sever the bond completely but that has been their brick wall for years. Hydra's suppressants can only suppress the bond, not break it." Bucky explained.

"At least I get to tell you more about you now, right? More about us? How much I lo-"

"I want to believe you, Steve. I do." Bucky cut in. "It's just.. It's damn hard when I don't have any memory of this, nothing I can personally feel confident about."  


Steve looked sad. His desperation to make Bucky remember wasn't doing any good in making a difference. Bucky had to remember on his own time and who knows if he even would?

Still, the two spent hours talking and listening. Steve doing most of the talking and Bucky doing the listening. On the rare occasion that Bucky had something to say, a memory or a genuine thought, it made Steve's heart light. Even if it was something small, it was something.

"So that's how-" 

Steve stopped suddenly mid sentence. Bucky cocked his head to the side and felt a dull ache in his arm.

"You alright, Steve?" Bucky asked, concern in both his voice and his eyes.

"Yeah, I'm just.. I'm not feelin' too well, Buck." Steve admitted, his heart thumping harder when he felt Bucky's arm wrap around him and pull him in closer so that Steve's head was resting against his shoulder.

"I thought you couldn't get sick?" It was a fair point and Bucky didn't feel any fear coming from the blonde.

"It's not that. I'm just.. I'm so hungry, Bucky."

Bucky paused himself from replying right away and thought about it. How long had they been locked in here anyway? It had to have been days. Even serum'd-up soldiers had to eat at some point.

Bucky moved away from Steve gently and slid so that he was now sitting in front of Steve, with Steve sitting with his back against the wall. He took a good look over Steve, his skin, his eyes. Steve was pale and his skin was on the cool side. Bucky looked in his mouth, without any protest from Steve, and felt his hands.  


"You're severely dehydrated. Try not to talk so much. Conserve your energy." Came Bucky's prognosis. Of course you didn't need to be a doctor to know that but Steve's chest felt warm at Bucky's careful handling of him. Bucky was pretty hungry too but he had been trained in the harshest conditions to go without food longer periods of time. Of course he had a breaking point but Steve's health was deteriorating before his was and he couldn't let that happen. He couldn't let that happen but he didn't know what to do.

Minutes felt like hours to Steve as he felt weaker, bouts of nausea coming and going. He tried not to complain to Bucky. Bucky was in the same situation and he didn't need an update every ten seconds. Steve cuddled into Bucky and closed his eyes, trying to sleep, but the hunger and nausea in his gut kept him awake. Bucky's arm was starting to burn and it was becoming more and more difficult to mask his panic and worry. He -had- to get Steve out of here.  


Steve turned away from Bucky and started dry-heaving. Not even bile came up.

"It's.. It's alright. Try to get some sleep." Bucky said, pulling Steve against him again when it looked like he was finished.

"I can't. My stomach hurts so much. I'm cold. God, Buck, this is torture." Steve groaned. Bucky kissed the top of Steve's head, his subconscious mind seemingly more aware of his connection to Steve than his conscious one. It's like he does and even says things that feel _right_ without putting much thought into it.

"Lean against the wall. I'm going to try to get us out." Bucky mumbled, again gentle when moving from Steve and walking up to the giant metal door of their cell. It wasn't like a regular jail cell with vertical metal bars. No. This was just one large, thick metal door with no window.

Bucky felt weak and light headed but he clenched his metal hand into a fist and punched the door. Not even a dent. He looked back at Steve, curled in on himself and huddled miserably against the wall, and that's when he felt it. This sharp bolt of sheer protectiveness, an almost-primal instinct of feeling like Steve's other half. He _was_ Steve's other half. _Is._

Bucky _felt_ it. With a new found rage and determination, Bucky growled in the most animalistic way and punched the door with everything he could.

The door dented largely. Bucky could do it.

With each smash at the door, he felt this new yet not unwelcome sensation warming his heart and filling him with all of the confidence and strength to get this done.  


Bucky's body shook with each metal on metal contact but didn't stop. He punched and attacked that door in the same spot over and over until a hole finally broke through. After that, it was easy enough to pry it open large enough to get out of. He turned to Steve and scooped him up in his arms.

"Hold on to me, Stevie.. this is going to get messy."

Earlier, Bucky thought that doing this would be suicide. There would be no way that both of them would survive escaping Hydra. But Bucky didn't account for their bond. He didn't account for this new surge of life flowing through his veins.

With one arm, Bucky held Steve, and with the other, he snapped the neck of the first guard he saw and took up his gun. The death of the next guard gave Steve a gun, too, and the two of them (well, Bucky doing the running) began their escape out of the hydra facility.

Ducking for cover behind large crates, Bucky grabbed at another gun on the floor (thanks Hydra guards!) and was able to head-shot three more guards. There were sirens blaring now and Bucky wasted no time grabbing Steve again and bolting to the next area he could take cover at.

"This would go faster if you didn't carry me. I could, I could walk." Steve said.

"No." came the simple reply.

"Bucky, you need my help! If not, we're both going to die!" Steve yelled. He didn't mean to get angry and he knew Bucky was just trying to protect him, but he couldn't feel useless. No matter how sick he felt, he wasn't going to just do nothing while Bucky carried his dead weight.

Bucky growled but agreed. "Fine."

Steve was helping and guards went down faster. When ammo was running low, Bucky took to blocking bullets with his arm and running up and grabbing men by their throats either killing them by crushing their esophagus or snapping their necks. It wasn't as quick as shooting but he had to make due. Steve had some shots left and he couldn't believe how far they had come, just the two of them. He knew they could do it.

"Bucky, look!" Steve called out pointing to a grenade strapped to a dead agents belt. Bucky scrambled to get a hold of it and looked at Steve.

"I'm going to throw this and that should clear the rest of the corridor. Stay close." Bucky instructed, pulling the pin with his teeth and throwing the grenade down the hall. He shielded Steve with his body as the explosion went off and he grabbed Steve's arm, darting forward.

Several minutes later, they are close to the exit and Steve is close to collapsing. He feels dizzy. Bucky can tell when he see's Steve slowly zoning out. "Damn it, Steve!" Bucky yelled. "Just a little more. Hold on."

And Bucky was right. By the grace of God or.. or something, the door to the outside world stood proudly in front of them. Bucky picked Steve up again and started walking towards it when Steve saw a soldier behind them. 

"Bucky! Behind you!" Steve called out, hoping he warned him in time. Bucky groaned loudly and Steve's arm pulsed like a wave of ice. Steve was seeing spots but he gathered up every last ounce of energy he had and raced towards the guard, slamming him to the ground and punching him in the face.

"Steve, stop! I'm fine and we have to get out of here!" he could hear Bucky yelling but his world was starting to grow dim.

"B..uck"

When Steve awoke, he was laying in a hospital bed, hooked up to different IV's and monitor's.

"Stevie." Bucky whispered, relief in his voice.

"You nearly scared the fuck out of me." he said, grabbing Steve's hand.

"You.. you were shot." Steve croaked.

Bucky sighed. "I can heal, remember? You didn't have to run off and do something stupid."

It didn't matter to Steve. Steve felt a side effect of that gun shot and all he could think about was ending that pain for Bucky.

"We made it. I took you back to your friends because I knew you would be safe with them." Bucky smiled just a bit but Steve frowned.

"They, they don't trust you. You're still the Winter Soldier, you still don't remember me, you're still a danger and a threat.." Steve trailed off, obviously not agreeing with the rest of his team. Not completely, anyway.

"And they're right. I can't be trusted. I could.. kill more innocent people."

Steve sat up in bed and shook his head.

"No, Bucky. I trusted you and you saved me." Steve reminded him stubbornly.

"You're the only person I wouldn't kill, Stevie. I'd kill for you, I'd do anything in the world for you and anything in the world to keep you safe.. but I have no boundaries. I know right and wrong but it's like I can't stop it. If someone just looks at you the wrong way, who's to say that I won't snap their neck? Or break their face?" Bucky reasons, his heart hurting from the conversation as well as Steve's.

"What are you saying?" Steve asked cautiously, trying to keep it together.

"I'm saying that maybe I should go back into cryo. At least until the world, or Stark Tech, is at a place in time where they can deal with my mind in the right way."

Steve was shaking his head again.

"Absolutely not. No fucking way." this time, It didn't take any kind of physical pain to both see and feel how much Steve was hurting.

"Stev-"

"No. No Bucky!" Steve yelled. "Don't you see? I love you. I love you with my entire being. My soul can't stand anymore heartache, Buck! You're worried about taking away someone else's soulmate but that's exactly what you're doing to me." The tears in Steve's eyes finally broke and the sight rips at Bucky's insides. He feels it.

Bucky was right but.. so was Steve.

"Please, Buck.. I know you don't want to hurt anyone else but can't we just allow ourselves to be happy for once? Don't you feel it, too?" Steve continued, sniffling, trying not to actually sob.

"Course I feel it, Stevie. I feel it fucking strongly. Don't you think I want you to be safe and happy and with me? It's all I want.. and I do love you. It's just been buried for so long and I've been so screwed up that It's going to take some time before I feel comfortable and stable enough to show it and say it as many times as I should be to you."

"I know. And I know you want to do the right thing. I'm being selfish.. I just don't know how much more I can take." Steve admits, feeling guilty for his selfish behavior.

Bucky let out a long sigh. "How about this.. I won't go into cryo. Instead, I'll get myself into some intensive therapy, take drugs or I don't know, do whatever shit they need me to do, but if something goes wrong, you have to promise you'll let them put me in."

"I.. I promise."

Bucky hugs Steve and Steve cries into his chest.

\--Three Weeks Later--

"God, you're beautiful, Stevie." Bucky whispers, on top of him. A bright pink creeps into Steve's face and reaches his ears.

Steve let's out a gentle moan as Bucky moves forward, leaning down to kiss Steve's cheek and then down his neck. Steve's soulmark and Bucky's flesh arm start to tingle and warm in a gentle and soothing way that Steve can't remember that ever happening between them before.

Their movements weren't hurried at all, taking their sweet time. They were making the most beautiful love.

"Oh, Buck." Steve quietly gasps. Bucky chuckles a little and encircles his hand better around Steve's hard and aching cock.

While the intention always stayed loving, both Bucky and Steve slowly became more frantic as their need to release became more urgent.

"Come with me, Bucky..?" Steve half asks. Bucky smirks.

"Tell me when, doll. I'm almost there."

Steve closes his eyes and swallows hard. Just a couple of more thrusts, a couple of more pulls of his cock and-

He could feel Bucky's lips on his soulmark. Steve shivers, already feeling the fire in his belly about to explode.

"Bucky, I'm gonna come. Baby, I'm gonna come." Steve warns, hoping that Bucky is ready.

"Oh.. oh yeah.. fuck.. let go, Stevie." Bucky groans, his final thrust sending them both over the edge. Despite the nature of it all, Steve's orgasm was ruthless and unforgiving. He could feel Bucky's pleasure and Bucky's orgasm mix with his own but more importantly, Steve felt the pure love that it was made up of. Bucky's deep, deep love for Steve. The love he couldn't articulate. He came and came and came some more as Bucky did the same deep inside of Steve. Bucky never felt anything like it. It was like letting go of a breath he had been holding for years. He, too, felt Steve's orgasm, and as they lay in each other's arms, enjoying the post-coital bliss, Bucky was home. Despite two souls being ripped from each other, Bucky figured it was their destiny to find each other again and he swore that never again would they be apart.

**Author's Note:**

> Talk Stucky with me! [MY TUMBLR](http://www.ortizshinkaroff.tumblr.com)


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